Wednesday 7 April 2010

How to make your girlfriend hate her celebrity crush


If you wonder how, it’s actually pretty easy. One of these days your girlfriend will go googly-eyed on some gymrat that you’ll likely loathe. Just because he has washboard abs and all you got are stretch marks, rashes, and a ginormous belly, that does not mean that he is the more superior Adonis (haha on the use of a Manila-based gaybar). Hey, it’s alright for a person to have a crush, right.

It’s only a crush… they like the person because he is so star-crossed that your GF befriending him or her (yum) would likely make the heavens turn yellow-orange. Don’t worry if he meets him though because we all know all celebrities are ultra vain. Girls don’t like that. It’s true, right?

Like I said – it’s pretty easy. Perhaps the biggest thing you could wallop to her senses is that you look like her crush. Even if your tummy is bigger than your man-boobs, you say your body is as yummy as her crush! Even if your face has unsavoury patches of facial hair, you say your face is as dreamy as her crush.
I did that to her when she mentioned Daniel Matsunaga and she has began to hate him ever since (Google if you don’t know him).

Sure, for guys with Scandinavian blood, built like a Norse god like me, it’s a bit of a downgrade than an upgrade. It’s not even an act of jealousy. You just do this because you diss her. Mad as it seems but you’ll love her reaction every time you do this.

I am 100 percent sure that It’s not “angry, furious, devil-will-definitely-cry” mad but the “cutesy” love that every male likes.

4 comments:

  1. lol. sorry lor, i think it doesn't work quite that way on me. haha!
    if my boyf did that to me, i'll hate him instead of my idol. hahahahah!

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  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  3. why hate your bf? WE ARE ONLY HERE TO LOOOOOVE YOU!!! hehe!

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  4. "ginormous belly..."
    UNDERSTATEMENT!

    ReplyDelete

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What you’re about to see right now are my real-life experiences. I can’t say if my tips and theories work. That’s why you have the discretion to believe.

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